Him: Okay, so we’re at a wedding and I slept with one of the bridesmaids and she’s now stalking me and I run into a broom closet to escape where I find–
Me: Stop. I can’t start a new story. I’m not bringing my laptop to Australia.
Him: Ah, but I run into a woman in the closet, Clementine, who hates me.
Me: What did you do to her?
Him: What happened to not being interested and not bringing your laptop to start a new book?
Me: I’m not. If it’s a great idea, I’ll remember it when I get home.
Him: [[Bent over in laughter, waving his arms]] Stop. You’re killing me. Your brain’s a sieve.
Me: Excuse me, but you’re the one who has to make it memorable.
Him: [[Rises up to full height, wipes tears from eyes]] She’s a veterinarian who saved my dog so I asked her out only she didn’t show because her father suddenly died, and then I showed up to the funeral only to find out she was married, and then I started dating her sister. But she dumps me, and I get invited to her wedding. I go, naturally.
Me: What do you mean “naturally?”
Him: Weddings are fabulous places to meet women. Anyway, I see Clementine there, find out her sister is marrying her ex husband.
Me: Who’s ex husband?
Him: Clementine’s. Try to keep up.
Me: So now Clementine is divorced, you lock eyes across a crowded room and fall in love?
Him: No, no. See? Your brain is a sieve. I run into the broom closet and find Clementine there balling her eyes out. So, I suggest a plan. We have sex in the bridal suite upstairs. It’s a revenge story–
Me: Alright. I’ll consider bringing my laptop. But why does Clementine hate you? Were you terrible in bed?
Him: Pfft. Hardly. I might have snuck out, and the sister and ex-husband-now brother-in-law found her asleep in their bed alone. Clementine was exhausted from her screaming out my name in ecstasy.
Me: You left her? Coward.
Him: What? I left a note.
Me: So leaving the laptop at home.
romcom
It’s National Fruitcake Day!
Love it? Hate it? No matter how you feel about fruitcake, read a short story about how it brought two people together.
Read It Was All The Fruitcake’s Fault here!
Conversations With Characters
Here’s a sneak peek into what goes on in my head. Or should I say — what goes on between me and my characters. They’re so bossy!
Him: Did you just use the word “snarled?”
Me: I’ve been waiting my whole life to find a good place to use it.
Him: Scowled would be better.
Me: Overdone.
Him: I want to scowl. And then smile unexpectedly.
Me: Then you’re out of the story
Him: I’m letting out a breath I didn’t know I was holding.
Me: What?
Him: Plunged into her hot center. Mewled like a kitten.
Me: What the ever lovin—?
Him: Dewy petals. Steely Shaft. His velvet length.
Me: STOP!
Him: [[Leans in closer]] Moist.
Me: Now you’ve gone too far. Okay, you can scowl. But only once.
Him: Then I’m letting out a breath–
Me: Alright. Alright. You can scowl and then smile. But no one’s getting moist.
See these on TikTok, too! @ElizabethSaFleurAuthor
Surprise! Book Sale!
Do you love steamy romantic comedy? Laugh Out Loud? Opposites Attract? Fake Dating? Pie?
It Was All the Pie’s Fault is on sale for 99 cents! But hurry. Sale ends soon.
★★★★★ “…charming and laugh-out-loud funny.”
★★★★★ “My only complaint is that it’s over…”
Nick and Chloe can’t be more different. He is a realist and craves freedom. She believes in magic pies and dreams of settling down.
But if he can get Miss Sunshine Chloe to be his fake date in exchange for helping her land her dream man?
He’ll finally prove to his bosses he’s stable enough for that promotion and Chloe can take that–shudder–march to the marital coffin.
Except her pie’s wishing magic goes haywire and all their pretend kisses turn smoking hot.
It Was All The Cat’s Fault — Now Live!
My latest steamy romantic comedy is now live! {{Insert all the usual Woots-Happy Dances-Celebratory Awkward Moves here.}}
This story was tons of fun to write. Not only did bedroom shenanigans ensue with Brent and Eve, Thor–one very adventurous Maine Coon cat–encourages it!
This bossy kitty waltzed into my office one and announced he also needed a role. Needless to say, he upstaged my hero and heroine a few times.
But Brent, our hero? His hotness cannot be denied.
Early Reviews!
“…Brent is definitely the unexpected!”
“…sizzling chemistry!”
“…Charming and most definitely sexy!”
“A feel-good book that is so needed!”
“Thor, the cat, stole the show. I loved his personality throughout the whole book.”
THOR! How did you get into my computer and pull this last quote? He is looking innocently at me, but I know better.
He says “buy the book. I’m in it.” Cats are so bossy….
Get a print copy from Amazon here.
Buy from Barnes & Noble (ebook) here.