Conversation With Characters

He’s the first character to show up in 2023. #overachiever

Him: Welcome back, slave.
Me: Wow, someone returned from the holidays with vim and vinegar.
Him: It’s vim and vigor.
Me: Starting out calling me slave isn’t the way to my heart, ya know.
Him: I thought we agreed to be honest with each other.
Me: Then, let me start out by saying this is a collaboration.
Him: Of one.
Me: Now who is making up their own definitions?
Him: Let’s get to it. I want a red-head next time. A master gardener who is allergic to the sun. I get to run heavy machinery. Flex my manly muscles while she sits under a shade tree and directs.
Me: Boring.
Him: How about she’s a modern day pirate with a crisis of conscious when she boards my yacht used to transport rescue puppies–
Me: Too far fetched.
Him: I’ll make them Westies. Wearing little life jackets.
Me: Not even then.
Him: She’s a cruise ship tantric yoga instructor on a single cruise and I get to fend off sixteen over zealous male passengers, only the boat starts to sink and she most definitely makes room for me on her door.
Me: There’s always room on the door.
Him: Of course we have to test the balance by having sex.
Me: Of course.
Him: Except she’s allergic to the sun and —
Me: We’re back to that redhead? Why don’t you go swim back to the boat and get her sunscreen. Flex those manly muscles.
Him: On it. <splash>
Me: <<Snaps laptop shut>> Let’s see how long he can swim, shall we? <<Goes to get wine>>

Was that mean?

Conversations With Characters

My hero from my current WIP. #SoBossy

Him: You’re making me too nice.
Me: You rejected your date.
Him: Of course. She isn’t the heroine.
Me: But going on a date, where the heroine could see you “in action” was part of the plot. To show how well you treat women and make her jealous right off the bat.
Him:  Stupid plot. Just let me at the heroine. I’m ready.
Me: No. You made your date cry and now the heroine wants nothing to do with you.
Him: Don’t look at me. You wrote it.
Me: What happened to “you’re just the typist to my dictation?”
Him: I changed my mind, which I’m allowed to do per the Character Code, the manual all characters follow.
Me: Let me guess. It includes a section on how to drive a writer crazy.
Him: Chapter one, baby.
Me; It’s the holidays. You’re supposed to be nice to everyone, including me.
Him: Okay, I’ll stop talking altogether.
Me: Wait! Don’t you have a great idea for me? To replace the quote-unquote stupid plot point?
Him:
Me: Hello?
Him:
Me? Heeeeelooooo?
Him: Silent Night. Holy Night.
Me: Is that a message?
Him: Yes. Take a load off.
Me: Aww, you are nice.
Him: Don’t get used to it.

Christmas Letter from Club Accendos

Alexander Rockingham, from the Elite Doms of Washington series, insisted on writing a Christmas letter this year to catch everyone up on what club members are up to. If you haven’t visited the world of Club Accendos, read more here.

~~~~

Friends, Family, Lovers,

From my home to yours, Happy Holidays. The Tribunal Council members send warm greetings and wishes for peace and joy this season.

Let us start by reaffirming that the Tribunal Council remains steadfast—as I do—in ensuring Club Accendos is a year-round welcoming and safe place for you, our chosen family. The holidays can be difficult for some. Per tradition, Club Accendos will be open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week between December 1 and January 1. You have a place here.

Also consider this letter your invitation to our annual Christmas Eve party, Christmas Day lunch, and New Year’s Eve ball.

Clothing is optional at the New Year’s Eve ball but mandatory for all Christmas events due to children’s presence. (I mean it, Lina.)

Speaking of children, Derek and Samantha announce they’ve had another baby girl—Clementine—who is as beautiful as her mother. Clementine joins my perfect godson Alexander and equally-perfect, first daughter Lilibeth. Derek’s message on the family news is as expected: all potential suitors of Clementine and Lilibeth can forget it—in advance.

Samantha’s dance studio, Aerobesque Dance Studios, continues to empower women through movement. Invitations to perform keep rolling in–including from the Kennedy Center and The White House–but Sam’s focus remains on her students, after Derek and her children.

Sarah, Steffan and Laurent expanded their family as well this year with two West Highland White Terriers, Bonnie and Clyde. Bonnie has Steffan wrapped around her little paw and has distracted him enough for Clyde to regularly rifle through Laurent’s closet. Clyde apparently prefers the Harry’s of London brand socks to chew over all others.

Check out the two dog’s Instagram and TikTok accounts. They are the face of Sarah’s new clothing line, Westillioux, now being worn by Oprah and Jennifer Aniston.

Carson and London visited Singapore this year to study sustainable architecture for their third house and designed by her brother, Benny, a remarkable architect whose client list is ever-growing. London holds out hope for comfortable furniture in their new home. Carson doesn’t understand but London loves him anyway.

Kudos to Carson’s legal nonprofit, Youth Freedom, which landed on the New York Times Non Profits to Watch in 2022. He’ll be angry I included this tidbit. London would be angrier if I didn’t so… Congratulate him when you see him. It’s good for him.

Marcos, now fully retired, and Isabella have been working on expanding her Garden Grace Foundation, which brings trailblazing green designs to developments and communities. I’m told pencil skirts and high heel boots are now all the rage in garden wear thanks to the recent paparazzi photos of her working in their home garden. Marcos also was happily cleared of all allegations he was behind certain photographer’s sudden career slumps.

Club Accendos was very lucky to have Isabella make time in her busy schedule to work on our gardens this year. Happily, our Monarch butterfly visitors have grown because of it. Check out the art gallery in the main hallway. Eric’s paintings capturing the molting of the last few who graced our grounds.

Jonathan and Christiana’s Foundation, which works with mental health issues of our youth continues to flourish. Their focus on ensuring no child should ever have to worry about their safety, future, or who they love won two new awards this year. The couple also opened their home to several new foster children. I have serious doubts any of them will ever leave. Expect to meet several of their kids Christmas Day at Accendos.

Daisy, their first adopted daughter, turns fourteen on Christmas Day. She shares Christiana’s entrepreneurial spirit, and now offers baby-sitting services for club members while they go “on a (play) date.” Club members sign NDAs stating they will never mention of what the date entails. Correct, club members?

Ryan and Yvette say there is nothing to report in this year’s letter. According to them, the fact two bedframes in Room B3 had to be replaced means nothing.

As for me, I remain blessed beyond what I deserve thanks to the love and dedication of Eric and Rebecca. Eric continues to paint and will be showing his latest collection on New Year’s Day at the grand opening of the refurbished Arts & Industries Building.

Yes, Eric, you are. You’re welcome.

Rebecca continues to dangle vacation trips before me. She argues I can leave the Club in Sarah’s very capable hands. She’s right on the latter, though I would miss all of you if I go away for too long. Clarisse has informed me the plane for the Mediterranean leaves January 2 regardless of my attitude. I am to be on it, which makes Clarisse the only person on the planet who can tell me what to do.

Then again, where Eric and Rebecca go, I go.

We look forward to hearing your news heading into 2023. In the meantime, as we ring in the New Year, remember this: You matter. You are important. You are loved.

Now be good. I’ll be watching.

~Alexander Rockingham III

Melbourne Bound!

Where are my wonderful Australia readers? I’ll be at RARE Melbourne, April 21 – 23. Who can I meet there? I am sooo looking forward to the event, and seeing Australia. Husband and I are making a Big Deal Trip out of it. We’ll be arriving in early April and tooling around the Southern part of the country for a few weeks before landing in Melbourne.

Don’t know about RARE Melbourne? Join the fun (even if you can’t go) at the Facebook Group Here.

If are going, and want to preorder books from me to pick up at my table, click HERE.