So, this happened yesterday… I wasn’t even writing this story when a heroine popped up from the recesses of my mind. If anyone could see inside my head they might run for the hills.
Heroine: Squee, the new Jimmy Choo sandals are out.
Me: You’re a veterinarian not a supermodel.
Heroine:
Me: Hello?
Heroine:
Me: Heeeellllooo?
Heroine:
Me: Okay. You can have the Jimmy Choos.
Heroine: And the Sophia Webster’s because I’m really a secret fashion critic on the side. With a surgeon boyfriend who has a yacht.
Me: You’ll fall off the deck in the ones you’re eyeing.
Heroine: Plot bunny!
Me: <<Blinks>>
Heroine: <<deep sigh>> Does no one have vision anymore? He’ll jump off the boat to rescue me. Wait. Two men will jump in and fight over who gets to rescue me. But I’ll save myself. The one who brings my Jimmy Choo back to me—
Me: Like Cinderella.
Heroine: Yep, but they only get me after 150 pages or so. I want them to fight hard.
Me: They?
Heroine: It’s a ménage. No. A reverse harem. And, the captain of the ship wants me, too.
Me: <<bangs head on desk>>